Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – SEPTEMBER 8 - 14, 2008
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POLL
Nation Split Down Middle
Half hates overeducated elitist snobs; other half hates ignorant redneck racists.
 
 
FACTOID
Internet Traffic Up 53% in 2007
Human contact down by similar percentage.
 
SPORTS
Baseball Begins Use of Instant Replay
Managers must now wait several minutes before getting tossed.
Some Olympic Stars Find Life
Difficult After Games

Blame lack of Pro Shot Put League, 35-Pound Weight Throw Tour or Pentathlon on Ice.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Tourism Threatens Easter Island Statues
Elders call for scarier statues.
FEATURE
Pick the word that best describes Sarah Palin without being sexist.
  A ) perky
  B ) spunky
  C ) feisty
  D ) fiery
  E ) zesty
  F ) nasty
  G ) uninformed as a post
Hint: Think global warming denial, creationism.
 
TECHNOLOGY
Public Has Many Choices
In Wind Power
 
  From large turbines (left) that can power a home, to smaller ones (center) that can power an air conditioner, to portable units (right) that can power a calculator or novelty bow tie that lights up.

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