Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – OCTOBER 9 - 15, 2006
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FASHION
Preview: Here's What You'll Be Wearing This Fall
If the ozone layer disappears entirely.
 
SPORTS
Baseball: Playoffs Help Fans Forget Steroid Scandal
Oakland's Balco Park sold out for A's-Twins game.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Report: Washington Inundated With Rats
They're eating away at the Constitution.
 
KIDZ KORNER
Vocabulary Builders
insensitive adj. racist, as in “racially ~
remarks”
dressed as vi. belonging to, as in “~ Iraqi police”
FEATURE
The TSA's No-Fly list has finally been examined by journalists. It contains which three of the following four groups:
A )All known terrorists
B )Dead people
C )People in prison
D )Everybody named Robert Johnson
Hint: If you're planning to fly somewhere soon, it's best if you're not dead, in prison or named Robert Johnson.
 
POLITICS
Campaigns Get Into Full Swing
Shown: President Bush poses for traditional “shoveling the shit” ceremony, which signals start of final month of campaign.

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