| SPORTS |
 |
Baseball:
Near- Riot Delays Padres
Game
After Roseanne Barr
(shown) sings national
anthem in Spanish. |
|
 |
|
| |
| KIDZ KORNER |
Write
Your Own News Story! Just
fill in the blanks in
this Reusable News
Template!
Representative ___ ____, (_, ___) had a one-
car accident in the nation's capital, driving
into a ____ in the early hours of the morning
on ___ ___. _____, son of powerful ____ __
_____, appeared drunk, according to police,
but was taken home and not tested for
alcohol. __hours later, ___ _____, a lawyer
and family spokesperson, emerged to deny
alcohol was involved or that there had been
any special treatment given to ______ due
to his family connections. According to his
lawyer, ______had been on pain medication
____ as a result of injuries suffered in a
previous one-car accident ___ weeks ago
when driving home from a celebration of his
release from the ___ Center, a rehabilitation
facility. ____ now admits he has a problem
and will return to the rehab center for further
treatment, said ____, adding that his family
is very proud of ___ for his courageous fight
to overcome his addiction. |
|
|
|
 |
| All the funding
for the campaign to
repeal the estate tax,
featuring imaginary
threats to family farmers
and small businesses, has
recently been revealed as
coming from: |
| A ) | small
family farmers. |
| B ) | small
business owners. |
| C ) | the
Inter-Galactic
Association of
Extraterrestrial
Entrepreneurs. |
| D ) | 18 of
the wealthiest families
in America. |
| Hint: there's no
limit to what a few,
determined families can
do in our democracy, if
they have enough money. |
|
| The toughest provision
of the new Lobby
Reform Bill passed
by the House is to
require Congressional
staff and encourage
members to attend
ethics training classes.
Who will conduct
these classes? |
| A ) | Trained ethicists from
our nation's colleges and
universities. |
| B ) | Lawyers with many years
experience in conflict of
interest issues. |
| C ) | Independent ethics
experts from other
planets. |
| D ) | Satan. |
| Hint: He's quite
busy, but he's always
found time to help the U.S.
Congress. |
|
|
|
