Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – MAY 16 - 22, 2005
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MEDIA
Maxim Magazine Celebrates “Hottest 100 for 2005” at Hollywood Party
You must have been #101.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Summer Movie Preview: Your Guide
Take the “II” in last year's titles and change it to “III” and you're ready.
 
BUSINESS
Dollar Sinks Again Against Euro
Also loses ground against beads, trinkets.
Pentagon Gives Halliburton $72 Million Bonus
Bonus is for overcharging, sloppy accounting, kickbacks.
Company Specializing In Extra Large Coffins Gets Entrepreneur of The Year Award
Cited for giving visitors to showroom free doughnuts.
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Moderate Alcohol Consumption Can Help Prevent Kidney Failure
But it can't prevent making a stupid remark at a dinner party.
New Class of Drugs Improve Memory
However most people prefer to forget the past.
 
SCIENCE
 
Geneticists Trace All Human Beings To Small Group in Specific Area of Africa
Group decided to split up, meet back there in 65,000 years.
 
CULTURE
U.S. Awards $4.4 Million to
Save Languages Threatened
With Extinction

Like English.
 
LAW
Court Tosses Suit Asking Cheney
To Reveal Energy Bill Contacts

Rules Vice President should be able to get frank advice from lobbyists, corrupt officials, criminals in private.

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