Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – MARCH 14 - 20, 2005
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PEOPLE
Charles and Camilla Commemorative Stamps Issued
Use restricted to third class mail.
 
TRAVEL
Hawaii, Popular Tourist Destination, Threatened With Overcrowding
Visitors finding hotels full, beaches jammed.
 
 
FEATURE
SPORTS
IOC Examining Competing Bids
For 2012 Games From London,
New York, Paris, Madrid, Moscow

Will compare suitcases filled with, respectively, pounds, dollars, euros, and rubles.
Gamblers Bet $30 Billion on
College Dropouts

Student-athletes compete in popular post-season collegiate basketball tourney.
 
PUBLISHING
Rapture Calendar Selling Well
Particularly among sinners doomed to be left behind.
  Reasons to Be Wildly Optimistic About Mideast   Reasons to Be Less Than Wildly Optimistic  
  Mubarak calls for elections.   Will choose candidates himself.  
  Tens of thousands demand Syrian troops pull out of Lebanon.   Hundreds of thousands demand they stay.  
  Iraqi elections huge success except in Sunni areas.   Civil War.  
  Arafat, impediment to peace, dead at last.   Sharon, impediment to peace, still alive.  
  Khaddafi now big friend of the West.   Khaddafi now big friend of the West.  

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