| POLITICS |
 |
 Diebold
Electronic Voting System
Gets Tryout
Test voters click once
for Bush, twice for Nader, three
times for LaRouche, and for
Kerry, one long click, followed
by two shorts, a long, then a
long-short-long combination. |
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| PUBLISHING |
|
People
Magazine Unveils “50 Most Beautiful
People”
As picked by millions of ugly readers. |
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| SPORTS |
|
Baseball Attendance Soaring
Since Steroid Scandal Broke
Some clubs hurriedly add “Injection
Night” promotions to their schedule. |
|
Olympics:
U.S. Ping-Pong Team
Selected
Though not among the favorites,
they say they'll give it their best shot. |
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| IRONIC TIMES POLL |
Poll: Half of Those Eligible
Won’t Vote
Reasons for not voting are many and varied.
( Statistics
courtesy League of
Women Non-Voters. ) |
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| ODDS AND ENDS |
|
Survey: 25% of Workers
Sleep on the Job
Poll conducted among employees of various
intelligence agencies. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
|
President's
Motorcade Flash
Frozen by Sudden Ice Age
Just as new movie predicted. |
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