Ironic Times

 NO. 152 "Expect the Ironic" AUGUST 11-17, 2003 

Aug 4
Aug 18
   SPECIAL: THE CALIFORNIA RECALL
 
Schwarzenegger Moves to Front of Pack in California Recall Race
Latest poll figures show bodybuilder holding slim lead over 192 other candidates.
  Arnold Schwarzenegger   17%
  Lou Ferrigno         14%
  Arianna Huffington         12%
  Zsa Zsa Gabor         10%
  Gary Coleman         9%
  Emmanuel Lewis         7%
  Larry Flynt         6%
  Angelyne         5%
  Elvira         4%
  Gallagher         3%
  Carrot Top         3%
  Gary Muledeer         3%
  Bozo         2%
  Ronald McDonald         2%
  Cruz Bustamante         1%
  Bill Simon         1%
  177 others less than 1%
U. S. NEWS
Bush to Urban League: Economy
Looking Up

Says he's had no trouble raising large amounts of money.
Tobacco Company Offers Free
Cigarettes for Life to Celebrities

"Count me in," says Charles Manson.
 
WORLD NEWS
Prominent British Think Tank, Fabian Society, Wants Overhaul of Monarchy
Suggests subjects be allowed to vote for a new king and queen.
Unocal Lawyers Compare Slave Labor On Myanmar Pipeline to Jury Duty
You feel better having done it, they explain.
 
REMINDER
   Stop and smell the genetically
   engineered roses.
 
ENVIRONMENT
Tourism Up at National Parks
Administration officials point to increased revenues since regulations were relaxed at Yosemite (shown) and other gems of the park system.
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