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IMAGES FROM SPACE SHOW
FRIGHTENING DROP IN PHYTOPLANKTON
But just look at all them pretty colors. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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U.S., Brits Drop Leaflets,
Bombs On Iraq
Leaflets read, "Sorry about the
bombs." |
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England's Monster Raving
Loony Party Wins Control of Parliament
No changes expected. |
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Falwell: Prophet Muhammad a Terrorist
God: Reverend Falwell an idiot. |
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Pakistani
Officials Force Miss
Pakistan to Drop Out of
Miss Islam Pageant
21-year-old beauty
(right) had already won
Burka competition. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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Iraqi Rulers'
Inner Circle Makes
Billions From Oil
U.S. rulers' inner circle makes billions
from oil. |
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India, Pakistan in Nuclear War
Details next week. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Reagan Gave Saddam
Anthrax in the '80s
Dole gave him Viagra in the '90s. |
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Moussaoui Trial Delayed Six
Months
Defendant needs more time to study our
nuclear launch codes mistakenly given him
by government lawyers. |
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Pat Robertson Charity Gets
$500,000 Faith-Based Grant From
Government
Funds will be used to feed starving
bigots. |
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REMINDER
Cellphones cause cancer, but are
very convenient. |
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College Less Affordable Than
Ever
Study sponsored by U.S. Army. |
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Middle Class Losing Health
Insurance
But problem is temporary
– middle class rapidly
vanishing. |
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| ODDS AND ENDS |
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British College Professor
Determines "World's Funniest
Joke"
It's the one about the British
college professor who determines the
world's funniest joke. |
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