| PEOPLE |
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QUEEN ELIZABETH
ARRESTED IN INTERNATIONAL
DRUG STING
“I told you so,” says
Lyndon Larouche. |
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BUSH BUILDS BACKYARD HOLDING
CELL FOR DAUGHTERS
“Just for the summer,” he
promises. |
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HEFNER: I'M NOT HAPPY
Reveals, in painful Vanity Fair
interview, that he's gay. |
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GOOD NEWS:
QUEEN MUM
IMPROVING
She's back on
her feet after recent
snowboarding accident. |
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TOM GREEN, DREW
BARRYMORE TIE THE KNOT
Begin stormy, 3½-year marriage. |
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BOZO THE
CLOWN QUITS SHOWBIZ AFTER
FORTY YEARS
Will run for governor of Minnesota. |
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MICHAEL
JACKSON ANNOUNCES
COMEBACK
He's coming back as
LaToya Jackson. |
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| THIS WEEK IN HISTORY |
 |
EINSTEIN MEETS THE
THREE STOOGES
Historic meeting takes place at
Moe's California
mountain retreat on July
19, 1947. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
 |
HMO's Blame “A Few Bad
Apples” for Problems
Small minority of troublemakers get sick,
demand costly medical attention. |
|
Lard, Nicotine, Crack Now
Considered Healthy in Moderation
New study welcome news for overweight
crack addicts who smoke. |
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Drug Companies Explain High
Prices
Needed to finance research and
development of new marketing techniques. |
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Study Shows Most Students on
Ritalin,Teachers on Prozac
Test scores improving. |
| |
 Men, Women,
Use Different Parts of
Body for Thinking, Study
Reveals
Women use both
sides of their brain, men use neither. |
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| SCIENCE |
|
New DNA Research: All Humans
Descended From African “Adam”
Authorities still looking for deadbeat
dad now 100,000 years behind in child
support. |
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Genetically-Engineered Chickens
on Steroids Lay a Dozen Eggs at a Time
“Probably safe for human
consumption,” says FDA. |
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Researcher Discovers Secret
Of Dreams While Sleeping
But can't remember it in the morning. |
| |
CENSUS
2000
Latest Figures Reveal New
Demographic Picture of California |
| Celebrities |
41% |
Extraterrestrials |
11% |
| Waiters |
23% |
Other |
6% |
| Personal
Trainers |
18% |
Don't Know |
1% |
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| CORRECTION |
|
Last week, in the Your Money
column, Mr. Money advised readers to
"pour everything" into the
depleted tech sector and "gobble up
attractive bargains among the struggling
dot-coms." Many of you wrote to say
that you lost all your money based on
that advice. We're sorry for any
inconvenience this may have caused. |
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