Ironic Times

NO. 50 "Expect the Ironic" AUG. 27 - SEPT. 2, 2001

Aug 20
Sept 3
 
HE'S NOT SURE
The President responds to question about when he plans to end his vacation.
U. S. NEWS
Helms to Retire From Senate in 2003
Looks forward to spending more time with family, fellow Klan members.
FBI Makes Arrests in
McDonald's Scheme

Accused allegedly put beef in hamburgers.
Poll: 34% in U.S. Favor
Legalizing Marijuana

Results based on telephone interviews with 1,017 pot smokers; margin of error 100 percentage points.
Polygamist With 5 Wives, 30 Children, Gets 5-Year Sentence
Complains that a monogamist would have only gotten one year.
 
PICTURE OF THE WEEK
PIG FLIES!!!
UN Security Council calls special session.
 
IRONIC TIMES EXCLUSIVE

 
 
An Interview With ...
Gary Condit


Ironic Times:  When she disappeared, were you having an intimate affair with Chandra Levy?
Condit:  Yes, I was.

Ironic Times:  Did you impede the police investigation by withholding information?
Condit: Yes, I did.

Ironic Times:  Have you been honest and forthcoming with the press?
Condit:  No, I have not.

Ironic Times:  Did you kill Chandra Levy?
Condit:  Yes, I did.

Ironic Times:  Thank you for speaking with us.
Condit:  My pleasure.
 
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